Sunday, November 08, 2009

Dirty Divorce Tricks

by Berna Abonita

This is a difficult issue. The heading uses the word 'dirty' and it means sneaky, cruel, underhand and more besides. The best advice in any would-be divorce is to be aware. Knowledge is power. And if you decide to trust your partner, to accept everything they say as gospel, and then possibly it may be a case of 'more fool you'. People change and people can do terrible things to hurt their partner. When a marriage fails, sometimes it brings out the worst in people. Here are dirty tricks divorce.

#1 It's what you sign, not what you say, is important. A spouse may have you sign an agreement whereby they have control of the kids but promises you access at any time. The court is not interested in what may have been said but what has been agreed to in writing.

#2 Beware of joint accounts. One spouse may withdraw a large amount and not tell you. You write some checks which bounce. You are embarrassed and may have a future credit problem.

#3 Financial pain can occur if only one spouse is earning money. They may delay paying certain bills. You are in no position to do anything re payment and the stress levels will begin to rise.

#4 On the financial issue, one spouse may have access to a credit card but it is the other spouse who is responsible for payment. The latter is presented with a monthly statement with some serious spending. This is one way to punish a spouse.

#5 File an incorrect report. One spouse may claim their partner has been violent or abusive when this is not the case. Building up a case against a spouse is done in several ways. Of course it is an offence to falsely swear a statement but a divorce can become a war zone.

#6 Parenting can become an issue. A male can be told that a child or children are not his. This claim can be proved or disproved with science of course but having such a claim made can cause great mental anguish. If the claim is true, the male is then possibly trying to obtain custody of a child who is not his. It can become messy and bitter.

#7 Silence is deadly. Couples are always urged to keep the lines of communication open even if it is through a third party such as a mutual friend, mediator or lawyer, but some people choose to have no communication whatsoever and this can cause pain and distress.

#8 False claims can be a nasty form of behavior. One spouse, who really has no intention to become the main or sole custodian of the children, makes a claim to the contrary. The other spouse doesn't know if this claim is made in good faith or not. It's not made in good faith but is used to increase pressure on the other spouse and cause pain and suffering to their mental health.

Remember that knowledge is power and be aware that dirty tricks can and may be played.

About the Author
My website, http://www.divorceguide.com, provides free resources and articles about divorce. Visit it now to find more divorce and separation advice

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Monday, September 14, 2009

Divorce Without a Lawyer

by Jimmy JoJaks

To have a divorce without a lawyer may seem difficult to imagine. Hiring lawyers to accompany you with your divorce is expensive because this deals with a life-changing decision. You are planning to disregard the foundation of your life. Nonetheless, other people try to make a divorce without consulting or hiring a lawyer. This may be impossible to achieve for some people but others dealt with divorce without a lawyer.

Experts call this kind of case as Pro Se divorce, where the clients themselves achieve a divorce without actually hiring a lawyer. However, there are several things a couple should consider before carrying out a Pro Se divorce. Firstly, the couple must agree with the arrangements concerning their properties, custody of children, and other assets. Moreover, children must be of legal age that only means their involvement is not necessary. Another requirement for a Pro Se divorce is the absence of stocks, pensions, and deposits from either party involved with the divorce. This type of divorce does not entertain alimony or the process of separating money matters. In case money or assets are present, a top divorce attorney is needed to discuss such arrangements.

In conclusion, both parties must agree to this kind of divorce even if only one of them decides to proceed with such option. Another important thing to remember is when either of the parties are in the military, Pro Se divorce is not applicable. Financial support will not be given after Pro Se divorce, hence, neither parties should not look for such after seeking advice.

About the Author
Jimmy writes a lot of content on the internet trying to spread the word about finance and investing. He likes to help people both save money and make money with the view of laughing all the way to the bank.

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Wednesday, September 02, 2009

Get To Know How Deal with Child Custody

by Dennis Gac

Bitter couples battling over the possession has always been a common sight, and in the recent times when divorce statistics have gone up ten-fold, it is an even more familiar sight. A battle concerning child custody is an intensely traumatic ordeal for all the parties, including the children involved. Conflicts usually center on who shall the children stay with and how much of visiting time the other parent gets. Sadly, the latter usually becomes more like a visitor in the life of his own children. Inevitably, one parent gets to pay the price for separation by being confined to the sidelines, as a peripheral guardian figure. Over time however, the concept of child custody has undergone many changes, in the historical context, so to speak.

As with most other issues, even the concept of child custody had a patriarchal bias till about the middle of the nineteenth century. Fathers were universally regarded as the sole parent figure who could take proper care of their children. This was probably because women were yet to emerge fully into the field of being "single mothers". However, with the increasing intensity of the female emancipation movements, things took a different turn around the early years of the 2oth century. By then, mothers slowly began to be recognized as the more responsible and caring parent, as the fathers spent more and more time outside the household, working for their livelihoods. However, things took a negative turn once again.

This has a different effect as well. Soon the fathers began to protest against this maternal bias and believed that they were being unnecessarily being excluded from the lives of their own children, through no fault of their own. They wanted custody of their own children as well. They argued that it was unfair to idealize the maternal love as all powerful and all encompassing. It was generally felt that custody should not be awarded on the basis of gender, but the intrinsic attributes of an individual, like his/her sense of responsibility, duty and so on.

In the later years of the 20th century, the legislative issues of child custody underwent a change. Post -world war, there were changes in legislation in case of marriages and divorces. The conception of joint child custody arrived, that is to say, both the parents had equal rights with regard to their children's growth and development. No more was child custody solely based on gender. Two kinds of child custody emerged-one of physical custody in which the parent had the sole authority of deciding where the children would live, and; the other of legal custody, which means that the parent was to take all decisions integral to the growth and development of the child.

Now, for obvious reasons of convenience, judicial records have attached more importance to shared legal child custody over physical custody. However, it is important to realize that these matters are indicative of a general trend which has undergone a change. In matters of child custody, fathers ultimately are receiving the short end of the straw as of now. Unfortunately, women still get the lion's share when it comes to it. As a result, men are now resorting to various legal and other socio-political measures that will enable this bias to be destroyed for once and for all.

About the Author
Dennis Gac represents Father Rights Organization which helps fathers to regain their children's back into their custody. If you wish to know more about father rights just visit the website http://www.fathershelphotonline.com and more information about father rights.

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Wednesday, July 01, 2009

What Everybody Ought to Know About Divorce?

by Dennis Gac

An epidemic has been slowly gathering momentum for the last many decades. Over the last two centuries, the world has undergone such changes that our forefathers couldn't even imagine of. Due to globalization, the world is becoming increasingly smaller as barriers break between different cultures. Science and technology has surpassed the wildest limits of human imagination. However, man has to pay a very dear price for such glory. Human relationships, which are the basis of all existence, are breaking down.

Broken homes no longer excite any surprise as the word "divorce" becomes a term of everyday use. With an increased demand for professional marriage counselors, people are flocking to whoever is available, for solutions. The scenario is extremely chaotic as one may imagine. Broken relationships and custody battles over children are occurrences that man has learnt to take in his stride. As behind every other phenomenon, causes abound here as well. For all the hype and glory surrounding globalization, one is really led to wonder about what interconnectedness it has achieved.

Man seems to be becoming more of an escapist with the lapse of time. Couples are unwilling to take the time and effort to solve matters and save a marriage. The only exit route is a divorce. One leads to another and so we have this new wave of emulation where one divorce encourages other couples to even consider it and keep it at the back of their minds. We have deliberately limited our options, to such a level that nothing other than divorce can make sense of a happy marriage. Our minds shut down and refuse to look beyond it. In short we have cut down our cognitive powers to almost a standstill.

This is a psychological phenomenon of close ended thinking. Our thinking processes become absolutely stationary and no other options but the one present in front of our eyes exist. We do not even bother to reflect and look for other solutions before calling up our lawyers to draw up divorce papers. Parting ways seem to be the only thing to do today. People are getting divorces for the pettiest of reasons, and that too just because everyone is too selfish and egoistic to make the first move in working things out.

The social and the psychological side effects of divorce are immense. Not only are the two people involved, it becomes worse if there are children as well. These kids grow up watching their parents fight out bitter battles in the divorce courts, slinging bitter abuses and allegations at each other. These children with such a traumatic background grow up to be repressed individuals with a variety of social, mental and physical problems. Also it sets a trend for the future generations to come, for whom divorces are the best options available. It takes only a minor misunderstanding or a petty fight for a couple to start off divorce proceedings. True commitment doesn't let go so easily. Divorce is an alarming phenomenon that has arrived as emotional baggage in the advanced lifestyle of modern man.

About the Author
Dennis Gac represents Father Rights Organization which helps fathers to regain their children's back into their custody. If you wish to know more about father rights just visit the website http://www.fathershelphotonline.com and more information about father rights.

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What Everybody Ought to Know About Divorce?

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Saturday, June 06, 2009

Prenuptial Agreement

by Jason Hennessey

A prenuptial (commonly abbreviated as prenupt) agreement is an agreement entered between a man and a woman who intend to get married, just before they tie the knot. Various countries across the world have been recognizing prenuptial marriage agreement for a long time. However, the terms of the agreement may vary from country to country according to the laws of those particular countries. Despite that, there are some aspects that remain common to most of the constitutions across various countries which apply the agreement. For instance, many agreements will show how to partition family property in case of divorce and how to take responsibility of the spouse and the children in the event of marriage break-down.

Many countries such as Germany, Japan, Canada, Great Britain, France, and others have had marital laws of which some have prenuptial agreements included. According to these laws, both the brides and the groom's parties should have a lawyer representing each side to ensure that the law is enforced without any slip-up. At times, both camps may retain a private arbitrator to witness and approve a prenuptial agreement signing, to ensure that the event has taken place as expected by the laws of the country. Some judges and law offices recommend presence of both the bride and the groom family members and coverage by media, for instance, through video recording.

Most couples are in support of Prenuptial Agreement due to disputes that may arise and cause termination of marriage. The agreement protects the spouse's property and guarantees responsibility of the spouses to the children. However, since most of the times these laws are unenforceable, prenuptial agreement may not be powerful enough to limit the rights and alimony of both parties. Therefore, it may not be possible to set aside some assets and execute prenuptial agreement after the divorce of the said parties.

Apart from guiding on what to do in case of divorce, prenuptial agreement also dictates what to be done in case of death of one or both spouses. The agreement acts as a contract or a will to claim all your probate rights; on property, homestead, allowances, predetermined heir rights, right to stand as an executor or administrator of the property of the spouse.

Contrary to what majority of the couples may believe, asking to have prenuptial agreement does not necessarily mean you are anticipating divorce. Through this agreement, family assets, ties and inheritances can be preserved. In all the marriages, disputes are more likely to erupt. This does not necessarily mean that there is no trust between the family members. For instance, financial matters are like to arise, and need to be faced. Taking a prenuptial agreement ensures that all is protected.

However, it is important to discuss the matter of the agreement with your partner before walking down the aisle. Be open to each other without having to hide thoughts and feelings. This will ensure that your trust on each other concerning the future of the family is solidified. Else, prenuptial agreement can not guarantee you will live together, in health and sickness, in richness and in poverty until death do set you apart.

About the Author
Jason Hennessey is the President and founder of 1weddingsource.com, today's leading wedding social networking planning site. 1WeddingSource is a nationwide wedding directory of wedding vendors connecting brides from almost every major center in America.

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Saturday, April 25, 2009

Three Things That Are Needed From A Divorce Lawyer

by Paul Abbey

You want three things in your divorce lawyer; expertise, reliability, and the right attitude. In these circumstances you will need a divorce attorney who has at least half their workload in this area and one that is able to act as a mediator.
Still, you also need to feel at ease with them; someone who immediately instills a sense of trust.

Mediation minded attorneys are more likely to give you problem solving advice, whereas traditional attorneys tend to be more oriented to conflict and their advice tends to be adversarial. Some of the work load will be yours so you need to ensure you are well prepared each time you speak with your divorce lawyer and know exactly what they need from you and vice versa.

Make sure you know exactly what you intend to ask and record the answers as each time you contact your lawyer there will be a charge involved so note times dates and durations of conversations. Keep a file for all your notes, letters and documents so do as much as possible on the phone and by mail to keep the office time at a minimum.

An attorney does not come cheap so use them only for the purpose you hired them for, legal advice, they are not there as an emotional problem solver, there are other professionals who specialize in that area. When you talk to a divorce lawyer, stick to the facts and don't complain about things your spouse did unless you actually want your lawyer to do something about.

You really want your lawyer to know that you are in control and in charge of what is going on and that they are to help you with legal and technical issues and not to get your life straight. You are employing them for their experience but at the same time you need them to understand that it is your divorce and you want to make the decisions about how it is too proceed. You will need to instruct them to forward any information they have received to you and you expect a prompt reply to any issue you may raise.

Don't think that you have to enter into proceedings armed with a lawyer in tow as they aren’t always necessary although you may wish to speak to one just for advice on a marital settlement for example. After you have organized all your facts and read about how the law works in your case, if you still have questions about the law or the likely outcome, write all your questions down and ask your lawyer. Divorce lawyers can draw up or assist with marital settlements their clients have drawn up themselves, but in this scenario, if things awry at least you will have someone who is familiar with your case.

About the Author
P Abbey owns and operates http://www.couplecounselingin.com Couple counseling

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Sunday, April 19, 2009

The Secrets to Hiring the Best Divorce Lawyer

by Joseph Carter

"Will you take this person to be your life partner" says the magistrate. "I do" you say. Was getting divorced in your mind when you walked down the aisle or took your place between the magistrate and your best man? Despite the fact that most couples never contemplate divorce, a lot of things can go wrong, and you have no other choice but to get out of the relationship to save your saneness.

At the point of detachment, your relationship has already deteriorated and you cannot communicate with each other sensibly without wanting to leave and not return. Fortunately, the best divorce lawyers may be just around the corner. The trouble now is how to discover these people and hire them to protect your stakes. To help you find the best divorce attorney who can give you sensible advice, here are some tips for you.

Do a Lot of Research

Obtaining the best divorce attorney who can campaign for your rights requires that you do your preparation, and do it well. Go on the internet and find a lawyer referral center near you. These referral centers have lists of best attorneys and some of them may be near you. You may not have to go far to to obtain counsel for yourself. If you there are no attorney referral services near you, ask your acquaintances, family members and co-workers for referrals. Someone in your circle of friends and family may have experienced divorce and he or she may be able to service you in that area.

When somebody refers a divorce attorney to you, don't hire the lawyer immediately. There's no confidence that he/she is the best divorce attorney there is. Before you employ the services of that attorney; first, you need to do some inquiry about his/her work. Find out who the former customers of that particular attorney were, and what happened to the case that he/she addressed. If majority of the clients of that particular attorney were content with the service, then take that attorney.

Confer With The Lawyer First

There are lawyers who are willing to do whatsoever his/her client requests. There are too lawyers who will stay with what they believe is correct. Be sure that your prospective attorney will address your divorce with your best interest in mind. Confer with that attorney first and talk over your divorce with him/her and agree on how to move forward.

About the Author
Joseph Carter writes primarily in the field of family law and divorce. He is associated with www.texas-divorce-info.com, a site where you can locate Texas Divorce Attorneys. If you are considering divorce or are already going through a Texas Divorce you can get a free 55-page Divorce and Custody Resource ebook by visiting www.Texas-Divorce-Info.com.

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The Secrets to Hiring the Best Divorce Lawyer

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